The Shit!!

I am convinced this world has gone to hell in a hand basket,--who came up with that phrase anyway? Why not just say it’s the shit!!! Yup, about sums it up. When neighbors poison each other’s animals because they bark too much , and gangs wage war over territories, which are really no more than streets, and men rape women and little girls just because they are bigger and stronger and they can, and women kill their babies because they make too much noise, I would say we passed hell a long time ago and now we are in the shit. If you think about this world that we are leaving to our children too long it becomes rather terrifying. But, you might ask, what can just one person do? Volunteer!! Find a cause!! Give your time!!! Give yourself!!! Give your heart!!! It’s all fine and good to go around preaching be kind to your neighbors, show them a smile and a kind word. But if you don’t walk the walk, ya shouldn’t talk the talk, and that is where a lot of people get themselves in trouble. We WANT the world to be a better place but how badly do we want it? What are we willing to sacrifice so that our children don’t inherit the shit? And don’t give me the “I’m too busy for that” line. That will send my blood pressure into absolute orbit. If you don’t TAKE the time, where do you think your future is going? It’s gonna get flushed, that’s where it’s going!!! And if you don’t TAKE the time you can pretty much just say you’ve also pulled the handle on your kid’s future too.

Anyone that knows me knows that I do A LOT of volunteer work. I am very involved in the American Cancer Society, various coalitions including Healthy Initiatives and the Cancer Coalitions, and I would like to become more involved in the battered women’s shelters and working with youth challenge programs. Why? Because I’m tired of the shit and I believe one person CAN make a difference. There is a trick to volunteering that took me a while to figure out. If it’s not something you are passionate about, you are not going to see it through. And sometimes it takes volunteering in more than one capacity before you find your passion. But just keep trying on hats until one of them looks fabulous on you because when you know you look good, you feel good, and have more energy to give it your all. And that is what successful volunteering is all about, giving it your all. No matter what the odds, stick to what you believe and always do it for the right reason. Volunteering because you want recognition or writing a check for a donation so you can use it as a tax write off is NOT the right reason. Volunteering because you want to make a difference in someone’s life is the ultimate reason.

In the beginning many volunteers want to be involved because they feel it will help them “heal”. Whether it be someone that has been through an abusive relationship and wants to teach others that they have worth and don’t have to stay in that environment, or whether it be someone, such as myself, that has lost too many loved ones to cancer, or whether it is someone that was abused as a child and wants to help others heal from that experience and teach them their past doesn’t define them, or whether it be an alcoholic or drug addict that hit rock bottom but had a hand that reached out to them and saved their lives and are now ready to be that hand themselves. Whatever the “healing” reason, the ultimate goal is to make someone’s life better by your efforts, because you care. Yes, volunteering does help you to heal, but what happens when the healing is done? You look around and find yourself surrounded by people who may not be perfect but are on the road to a better life, because of your efforts and may one day return that favor to someone else.

So, to get us out of the shit, I recommend we start trying on volunteer hats and find one that fits and wear it proudly. One person CAN make a difference, one person at a time, one life at a time, slowly and methodically, not letting any obstacles stand in the way of giving someone hope. If we can do this and teach our children, the next generation to do this, we can travel back through hell, and up through the toilet and out into the sunshine again. Sure, there will always be evil in the world and along with that will come evil people in the world. But we wipe out the evil that we can and eventually the toilet paper comes out clean.

How Many Birthdays Does It Take?

How many birthdays does it take until the child in us is completely gone? Through the years we lose the innocence, the naivety, and the wonder that we are born with as children. As we grow up we learn to accommodate society by adhering to certain rules and expectations. Life experiences sometimes harden our hearts in relationships and make it difficult to allow others into our lives. We begin to have certain expectations of our own and begin to judge others accordingly. We take for granted simple things in life like sunrises and sunsets. In the blur that life becomes we forget how to laugh, how to truly love, and how to give of ourselves completely. Today is my birthday. Birthdays always remind me of children and I can’t help but think of how life would be if we carried more childlike traits into adulthood. This is what I’m thinking:

We should say what we think and state our opinions often with little regard to proper etiquette. We should make friends easier, without judgment or criticism. We should play hard until sweat pours off our foreheads and we reek of the outdoors. We should give hugs when we feel like it, not just during the “appropriate” times. We should take in the smallest details as if it were the first time we were seeing them. We should not have to eat anything we don’t like and we should not have to clean our plates unless we are truly hungry. We should be more agreeable when things don’t go our way and just move on and find something else to do. We should snuggle often and soak in the smells of the person we are snuggling with. We should always question what we don’t understand without fear of ridicule. We should believe there is nothing we can not do. We should love with all of our hearts and forgive easily and without a grudge. We should share our favorite desserts with our BFF’s. We should play on the swing set and slide down the slides more often. We should not be afraid to get dirty or to play in the rain. We should cry at sad movies and laugh out loud at the funny parts, even if no one else thinks it’s a funny part. We should learn to color with crayons and feel how relaxing that can be. We should learn to dance the crazy chicken dance. We should learn to laugh at ourselves. We should know that sometimes someone can kiss our bo-bo’s and make them better if we let them. We should trust that our friends and family will play nice with us and not dwell on whether our heart will get hurt. We should stay in the bathtub until our fingers and toes have wrinkles. We should find such pleasure in doing something that we lose track of time and are able to truly enjoy the moment. We should never forget the words to lullabies. We should find friendship and love where we find it, not in where we are “supposed” to find it. We should have at least one person in our life that we feel totally and completely “safe” with.

Life would be so much simpler and more fun don’t you think?